Silence isn’t golden with your Japanese girlfriend

Found in Dating Japanese Women

Understanding your Japanese girlfriend can be very difficult, but not impossible. Probably one of the hardest things for Western men is catching those “non-verbal” cues that she sends out almost constantly.

The one that Japanese women use quite often is not really a non-verbal cue, but instead is not talking at all. This is a little different than the Western woman’s “I’m not talking to you because I’m mad at you” but rather “You won’t try to see things my way so I’ll just be quiet and deal with it.”

Japanese women (and Japanese people in general) prefer to quietly deal with bad situations rather than to verbalize their disapproval. This works in arguments as well. For example:

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“Your Japanese is Very Good!”

Found in Japanese Culture

I know that many of the reader’s of the Understanding Japanese Women Blog live in Japan, and so what I’m going to talk about today most likely won’t be any big news to you. This post is for those of you who don’t live here or have just arrived in Japan and have yet to experience this silly situation.

What I’m talking about is the slightly annoying habit that Japanese people do. It’s the “Nihongo wa jyouzu desu ne!” (Your Japanese is very good!) compliment.

It’s something that 99.9999% (approximately ) of all Japanese people say to any foreigner who utters even the simplest of Japanese expressions, including “konnichi wa!” (Hello, Good Afternoon) It seems so odd to most Westerners living in Japan that Japanese people can offer up such glorious praise after hearing the simplest of utterances.

But there is a reason…

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Why I wrote the UJW eBook…

Found in Dating Japanese Women

I know exactly how you feel — I’ve been in your shoes.

I’ve dated Japanese women (and am now married to one) and have lived through the frustration and confusion of trying to build meaningful relationships with them. And I know that I’m not the only one.

Seeing as the differences in culture can cause great problems in relationships with your Japanese girlfriend or Japanese wife, I decided to share everything that I have learned by writing the UJW eBook. If I can help others avoid the pain of working on a relationship through the trial and error process, then I feel that I’ve done what I set out to do — I have succeeded.

And so, when I receive e-mails like the one below, I get the biggest thrill:

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Should you contact your Japanese girlfriend first?

Found in Dating Japanese Women

I received an email the other day from a reader of the Understanding Japanese Women Blog (and a satisfied customer, I might add.) He posed a very good question that deserves an answer. Since it is something that many of the UJW Blog readers could benefit from, he gave me permission to talk about it here with all of you. Here’s an excerpt:

“I had an interesting talk with the (Japanese) woman who cuts my hair yesterday and she was telling me about how Japanese girls are told not to return all calls/emails because this is supposed to make the guy think about her more. Personally, I just get bored with the game and move on but it has given me some insight that may cause me to be more forgiving…. Have you heard anything along these lines before?”

As a matter of fact, I have. And this is certainly is something that needs to be answered so all of you can better understand your Japanese girlfriends or those Japanese women who you wish to get closer to.

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Relationships with Japanese women — Part 2

Found in Dating Japanese Women

Men who are involved with Japanese women are often very confused when the inevitable problems begin to arise in the relationship. They try every possible solution that they know to quickly and painlessly mend the breach between themselves and their girlfriend — but they come up empty.

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